No matter who we are or how confident we feel, we’re all familiar with the experience of arriving at a crossroads in search of answers to life’s too many questions. Whatever we choose is a result of our decision-making, be it ever so trivial or earth-shakingly important. Sometimes by opting not to make a choice or take a side, we still have made a decision.
What should I have for breakfast? What should I wear today? Should I accept this new job offer? Who should I hang out with this weekend? The minute we wake up, we are faced with questions. We ponder over the possibilities before we even get out of bed, and before we know it, many of our decisions have already been made.
The reality is that our lives move so quickly that we don’t get to spend much time dwelling on most decisions we make. Often, we don’t even realize that we’re making them, especially when they pertain to the little details of our everyday life. We just pick out one choice and move on, as we do when we’re surveying grocery aisles and throwing a bunch of things into our shopping cart, or opening a kitchen cabinet to grab a box of cereal in the morning.
Remember the feeling of being a child when your mother asked you to pick out a book or a candy bar in a store and how you took your time lingering from one choice to another, and often did not know what to do? It is only natural that children find it challenging to make simple choices as they have just embarked on the journey of life.
As we get older, we attend to our daily affairs more and more on autopilot, often making decisions based on our experiences, habits, or previous knowledge about the things that we have gone through over and over. We only seriously put on our “thinking caps” when we are faced with something that disrupts our normalcy, like falling in love, a painful breakup, or the sudden loss of a job.
Let’s face it, our daily lives are made of hundreds of question-and-answer sessions. How to efficiently and effectively deal with them can have a long-term impact on our health, wealth, and happiness. “Autopiloting” often makes bad habits hard to break while overthinking trivial matters can create a lot of unnecessary stress, making life painful and difficult.
It is never too late to reflect on our old habits and form healthy new ones to promote our self-understanding and confidence. It is also never too early to train our children on how to make decisions by encouraging them to independently manage the little details of their own lives so one day they will grow into healthy, happy adults.
For as long as we are here on Earth, our never-ending questions and answers will remain vital parts of our lives. Sometimes we just have to slow our rhythm down and give ourselves the time and space to fine-tune our habits and routines. Remember, our “thinking caps” are always there when we need them.
You can always reach me at qstubis@gmail.com and please visit me at www.QinSunStubis.com. You
can also find a copy of my book, Once Our Lives, online at www.Amazon.com.